>be in class
>everyone goes around saying their name and something about theirself
>i’m the only one who says they like to work out
>girl next to me then whispers “wow you’re so lucky to be skinny
>rage starts building
>skinny girl stands up and says “i love food” some chuckle
>beached whale next to me says “omg me too” and the same amount of people chuckle
>think to myself “yeah i bet you do, fatty fat-fat fattyfuck”

>Stupid fat, obnoxious hamplanet named carly
>Easily 270
>Known for pissing her pants while laughing
>Happens multiple times throughout middle school and high school
>Somehow socially acceptable i.e “Oh thats just carly!”
>mfw I didn’t understand hate until I met this girl

>There is this fat black guy who goes to my gym
>The first time I see him he’s already just sweaty as can be, start to form my biased opinions
>I’m sitting down on the rowing machine just watching to see what he’s gonna do.
>mfw he starts doing crazy high rep circuit training
>mfw I’m seeing him regularly, he’s like the hardest working guy I see at the gym
>I don’t understand how he is so fat

>liz is neighbour freshman year
>fucking 5 2’
>easily 250
>easily the fatest person in the whole scholl
>next year we are all talking about freshman 15 and if we got it
>i lost 15 actually..
>everyone else gained
>liz’s roomate was there liz wasnt
>liz gain the freshamn 50!
>next year
>liz gain the freshamn 50 again
>decided to go on diet
>buys diet chocolate bars that are 100 cal each
>eats the whole box on the first day
>done dieting it doesnt work

>the fatties are now well behind, probably contemplating turning around rather then climbing this Everest before them.

chuckled heartily.

>be 12 years old
>see playground fight
>morbidly obese kid in year above vs normal kid in my year
>normal kid throws a punch at fatty
>fatty doesn’t even seem to notice it
>fatty pushes over normal kid
>his inertia carries him over too
>he just lies on top of the kid for the eternity it seems to take for teachers to come
>i can still remember the kid in my year screaming “no! have mercy!”
>turns out fatty stole and ate that kids lunch
>in the same lunch period he took a couple other kid’s lunches and told them he’d sit on them if they told
anyway
>later on
>get asked to go to staff room to do some photocopies
>walk in on fatty and his gigantic parents talking to headmaster
>”he’s a growing boy - he needs to eat”
>”yes, but not other people’s lunches”
>the parents didn’t understand why this was unacceptable.
>i burst out laughing when they said something about how he didn’t eat all of their lunches
>he left the fruit
>got an after school detention because the head couldn’t upset the parents by letting me get away with it.
>me and the head just played guitar together for an hour instead

>Injure my foot on the weekend so i’m walking around with a limp
>Have to go to uni because I can’t miss important lectures
>Catch the train in, uni train station is about 1km from the centre of uni, where I need to be
>Start limping along since I can’t walk properly
>Quickly fall behind the group of other uni students from the train
>Even the fatties are overtaking me
>About 500m in though, I can see the previous fatties ahead
>Eventually I catch up
>Even with walking with a limp, and my foot hurting with every step, I actually overtake these fat fucks
>That feel when a cripple has more stamina then the ordinary fattie
>turn around as i’m reaching the top of a hill, the fatties are now well behind, probably contemplating turning around rather then climbing this Everest before them.

>one of my friends is from town
>she invites us boating one day
>she invited Ali too
>her mom brings with this couch type tube 3 people can fit on it
>pretty fun day, I avoid being on the tube with Ali
>they stopped the boat because Ali wanted to get on
>I was about to volunteer to get off when my friend volunteered
>start to get off anyways
>Ali jumps on and the shock of being suspended in the air kept me from reaching the boat in time
>the whole time we’re riding behind the boat Ali’s legs kept smashing down on mine and I couldn’t really use my handle because she was sitting on it
>finally the boat stops and I scramble to get off
>my name got called so I turned around to look
>catch a glimpse of Ali’s swimsuit riding up, pubic hair pubic hair everywhere
>MY EYES

>6’0; 180 pounds trying to cut
>haven’t eaten all day, minus apples and crackers
>decide to go to lunch hall. load up on turkey and fried chicken
>finish and decide to spoil myself some
>go to the ice cream bar and get a few scoops of vanilla
>as I was in line, some fat, balding, pale creature walks behind me
>”oh, is that chocolate syrup?”
>everyone in line looks at him
>he cuts in front of everyone and grabs a mini plate
>loads up on the cakes and brownies
>drenches them in chocolate syrup
>a skinny twig is asking the chef about some cookies for desert tomorrow
>fatty interupts, “only when they are fresh! they are only good when they are fresh!”
>he hobbles back to his table with one of those fat people smirks. yeah, you know the ones I’m talking about. where they look like they are out of breath

>be on toronto subway
>front seats are foldable to make room for wheelchair users (folded unless you pull them down)
>fatasfatass ali waddle on inside
>looks around
packed
>goes for accessability seat
>pulls one down
sits..
>nope
>pulls another one down
thats bett-wait for it
>pulls third one down and sits in the middle

fucking classic ali

>get done lifting at gym
>notice im 300 cals behind on food
>go to mcdonalds to get 1 mcdouble, dat dere bulk
>waiting behind the car thats at the head of the line
>keep seeing bags handed to the car for a straight 10 MINUTES
>see them pull into parking lot (2 landwhales)
>get my food and drive up next to them
>”Jesus christ you fatasses order the whole fucking menu? Enjoy your heart attacks fatties”
>didnt hear screamed response as I had already driven away

not a great one, but seeing those fatasses get 5 bags of food was fucking disgusting